0		What, you, like, gift?

When buying someone a gift I always think if the recipient would like the gift he/she is receiving. So I am posing the question does a gift still possess the attributes of a gift if the recipient already knows what's beneath the gift wrapping?

After seeing a lot of unwanted gifts sold by unsatisfied recipients, the last thing I'd like to happen to the gifts I give is when someone actually do the same. It's like an indirect request to "just send me the money and I will buy one for myself". So now I am torn between asking a person what s/he wants and just pulling off a surprise.

Asking
Buying a gift after asking the intended recipient what s/he wants is like heading to the brewing counter after being told "I'd like to have Caramel Macchiato, please". Gift wrappers become more superficial add-ons whose purpose is to delay the recipient's predefined reaction. The feeling of unwrapping of the gift is equivalent to of opening a shopping bag; in short there is no element of surprise anymore. But at the same time, both the buyer and the receiver are assured that the gift will be useful and will never be shelved.

Surprising
The traditional gift giving is done this way -- surprise someone. If you know the person well, you ought to have an easy time figuring out what this person likes. But this advantage could backfire as the gift you are preparing is an exact duplicate of what this person already purchased as a gift to him/herself. The role of the gift wrapper is to formalize the gift with sincere intentions of showing you are spending enough time to research, buy, wrap and present the gift to the recipient. But what if it's a duplicate? What if you're wrong in your assumptions?

So now I am trying to be practical. What Cathy or Joanne does when asking me what do I want for Christmas should also be what I need to do. And I did it to my godsons Ernest, Eugene and Raphael. On the other hand, I just got a response from Karen that she finds the gift I sent her last night as useful.